(DISCLAIMER:: I am busy.. grammar and structure doesnt matter to me at the moment. just trying to do BEDA and get it out there... i have physics hw and catia to work on.)
Something interesting....ugh... ummm
So, this past weekend was Easter Weekend. Something that I have always been with my family during. This year I stayed in Starkville so I could get some work done on Aerospacey stuff. And the fact that i am traveling this week and possibly next weekend. Too much road time makes a very exhausted mk. Anyway. This was the first Easter that i havent really, well, celebrated. It is kind of odd that i find myself here now. I have been very much struggling with the whole "religion" thing. This year has been the year where i have fully acknowledged the fact that I am just not okay with religion. It still feels weird. Why? I grew up with a family who definitely went to church occasionally and what not. Not saying my family was uber Christian... or bible beaters. Just that we went to church now and then and were taught christian things. I have a problem with man kind. And people just really disgust me a lot. Maybe i need to get out of the south... but maybe i will find what i have found here. I am not trying to bash any religion. I am just here saying that... from what i see.. it's a flawed system. When i was younger the first question someone would ask me when they met me was "What church do you go to?" being the new girl in town, i didnt have a church. And to say that to that person... you can never forget a face like that. you just cant.
a lot of people dont know this about me, but i did at one point think about becoming a priest for the Episcopal church. That was probably the most religious i have ever been during those two years. Funny how things have changed so.
I dont know where I stand exactly on religion. Many cases it disgust me. I find if fake and full of fake people trying to put on their face so they feel better about themselves.. or to be "seen"... whatever.
I know this comes across as a very bashy on people. I know that not all religious people are like this. I do. I know people who are not like this.
Something that constantly worries me of late is for my group of friends at college to find out i am not religious. the majority are very much so. I worry that look... you know that look. that look that i received when i said i didnt belong to a church. That look when i missed a sunday service.
anyway. this isnt everything about religion that bothers me just a splotchy, omg am i really writing this online, stream of fidgety consciousness... i hope it doesnt offend
I recently started watching the NatGeo channel... and there was a guy who was captured by this group of violent people. The english translator of the group ended up helping the guy escape and the guy asked the translator why he put his life in danger to help him escape and the translator replied, "I believe we are all brothers under the same god." this really struck a chord with me. and made me actually believe in mankind a little again... that there are actually people out there who believe this. it is comforting i suppose.
We are all brothers under the same god....
April 5th...
15 days until CATIA deadline.
21 days until finals
2 days until AIAA Conference
Those numbers terrify me.
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I wish more of what the world saw of people's faith was the positive, but the bad/ugly stuff always seems to get more attention. Then there are people that mean well but push others away or try way too hard to be perfect when it's just not possible.
ReplyDeleteI can just hope that how I live out my faith attracts more than it repels. My advice though isn't so much to put/have faith in men so much as God. The former is bound to let you down most of the time.
I am not religious. Not at all. But the reason I am not religion isn't just that I am not a believer - it is that I can see how humans twist texts like the Bible or Koran to their own liking. To a point where they can essentially get away with anything - murder, inequality, moral superiority etc.
ReplyDeleteI think unlike past generations we are growing up in a world full of the internet where it easier to find out about that kind of thing. It has become clearer to us.
The way I see it there should be no right or wrong in religion. If you believe in God and are a good person (which you are) then that is ALL that matters.
Helen